Pain In My Heart

Emotional Train Wreck on Track One…

Emotional Train Wreck on Track One…


Gracious afternoon to you!

I realized a very long time ago that I was a little messed up.cbd_tall Emotionally. I tend to take things different than most guys. I can get more emotional than I like. Stuff can hit me and I just don’t handle it well.

Some things are best for me to avoid, but I just don’t. Soldiers coming home are one of them. Or anything about American military personnel. A friend posted on Facebook an encounter he had with a WWII vet. Totally screwed me up. Short simple paragraph and I’m fighting tears.

I think about how awesome my kids are. I tear up. I read about a person meeting Jesus. I tear up. It’s like Jeff Foxworthy jokes, but it’s reasons I tear up instead “You might be a Redneck.” I know some guys are like, “You got woman DNA.” Nope, I just managed to get a little more than my share of feelings. All men have it, I’m just not so good at keeping it under wraps.

So, I tend to be sensitive, also, to the Holy Spirit. I know I have a few Gifts in me. And, one of them, is empathy. It comes out in my emotions sometimes.

Have you ever felt a thick pressure in your chest? You know, when something bad happens? Or when something great happens? When the Flag is raised? Certain Patriotic songs? Seeing that friend or family for the first time on forever? Or, saying goodbye for a long time? It’s who we are. And honestly, I wonder about people who never have that happen to them. That never seem to be affected by circumstances. Tough as nails all the time.

It might feel good that pain never hits you and messes you up, but it’s not normal. Love within us and pride for the good things of the world should affect us. It’s how we are made. I know emotions can often cause problems. But, being a Vulcan is not really the great thing it’s made out to be. We need those emotions. We just have to make sure they are under control.

It’s the way God made me. So, I guess I just need to remember that.




Author: Matt Davenport

I love to write. I write books, blogs, articles. Mostly about God and His amazing blessings. Sometimes about other things. But mostly about God. I have a fixation on comma. Please forgive me if you see too many of them.

3 thoughts on “Pain In My Heart”

  1. As one who tends to fall on the other end of the spectrum, I can tell you it sucks…. I never asked to be hardened to normal emotions, life just did it to me. Whether it was the loss of my mom as a child, years of abuse in my father’s home, or years of seeing things normal people should never see in the military, something finally shut down a lot of those simple feelings.
    I am not writing about it to complain, but rather to tell people, never ask to not feel pain, or hurt, or love….the lack of feeling is a far tougher pill to swallow than any hurt can be. I personally pray all the time for the ability to feel more, and I believe God is working on me as we speak. I trust that he will do what is needed to “fix” whatever is broken in me.
    God Bless you all, and may you always FEEL his love.


  2. Indeed brother, feelings can be an answer to prayer. Many people who have fought for their country and have been exposed to the horrors of war struggle with emotions. Both too much and too little. But, I am here to tell you Bob, you don’t need to be “fixed.” I know, easy for me to say, but God’s got this and there may be room to be improved (as we all need), but knowing and loving Him is a guarantee that all will be right someday. Thanks for commenting. Love you man!


  3. Emotions are a gift from God! I know several men that show their emotions more than most, but that is all right!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s